On the map, I found a reservoir off the freeway for us to stay at. I’m glad I could convince them to upgrade to an iPhone on the way out, though. I’m not looking forward to thirteen hours of traveling with my parents, but with all our stuff and towing my Jeep, we really couldn’t fly. Once I finish writing, I’m forcing my dad to stop so I can mail it. They’ll keep me rational until you are in my arms once again. I’m going to wear both, reading and staring at your beautiful face all day. How will I get through this? Thank you for the pictures and the note. Your salty tears are still on my lips, and I smell you on my clothes. We’ve only left one another, and I had to write you.

“I miss you, Fin,” I whispered, hoping God would help me deal with this in some way.Īnd I’d thought the countdown to college was unbearable before. I traced my finger over the ink, wishing his hands were touching me. He’d vowed to write, text, and call whenever he could until I reunited with him in Florida in a few months, but would that work? I could already see we’d be attached to the phone until we were together again.

Our bond, sealed the day Fin kissed me, rubbed like a piece of glass lodged within the tender folds of my heart, needling its way further inside with each labored beat. A temporary reprieve lasting as long as it took to read the letter. Daily there’d only be a few minutes of bliss as I ripped open the envelope that filled my soul with his words. Already, something inside my soul had died and this ritual became crystal clear. He’d written yesterday’s date - Sunday, April 10th - across the top, the day he left me.

I clutched Fin’s first letter against my chest and crumpled onto my bed. And for keeping your promise to each other for over forty years

Everblue by brenda pandos